In Response to Hannah's Challenge
First of all, I have to say, Hannah, that you got the "nursing with Daddy" story wrong. I was on a session or out for groceries (or out getting hammered with friends) and you started crying and would not stop. Nonplussed and unable to console you, your father, out of desperation, lifted his shirt and did what any creative, well-meaning father might try when he was fresh out of options. I basically walked in on the event, breasts bursting with milk. I was like..."What's going on here?" So, it was not in a car and no one else was present... do you really think your father would pull a stunt like that with an audience? But he's not afraid to tell the truth either. He was a little bit defensive when I screwed up my face at him and started laughing uncontrollably.
OK. Onto the Random Six Challenge
1. If I run out of cigarettes, I've been known to dig through ash trays at home for long butts. I know... this is sad and wrong.
2. I eat weird combinations of food, especially for breakfast, like... recently I had some leftover ring sausage & kraut, an egg (over easy) all covered with rooster sauce with a brownie and grapefruit juice, and not necessarily in that order. Oh, I think there was an Emergen-C and a few bites of hummos on a carrot in there somewhere.
3. When I was a kid, I used to give myself injections. Um-hmm. I had acquired syringes and needles from the doctor's office where my aunt worked, which she simply gave me, along with scalpels, tongue depressors, a stethoscope and myriad other implements, since I wanted to be a surgeon when I grew up. In my basement laboratory, I filled a boiled syringe with distilled water, held it upright and plunged until some water squirted out the needle after tapping to loosen bubbles and would then jam it into my leg. Why, you ask?
Multiple choice answers:
a) my friends wouldn't let me do it to them
b) i was sick of pretending on my surgically mangled and dismembered dolls
c) i liked how it felt
d) it was the 60's version of "cutting"
e) all of the above
4. At a certain young age, I chose to not cry. I willed myself against it. I didn't want "them" to win, whomever "they" were but "they" were always watching. As an adult, I cry a lot in the car listening to music... and sometimes, singing a cappella. Somewhere "they" are now winning.
5. I had always wanted a dog as a kid and my parents were unrelenting in their resistance. It was the only item I would put on my Christmas list every year, like this:
1) puppy
2) puppy
3) puppy ... and so on to the end of the page.
So, instead, I had a string. I dragged this string around everywhere. It had all kinds of animals on the end of it starting with puppies and ending with lions. I tied it to my bed at night. Its name, no matter which animal was attached, was Ralph. Eventually, I was allowed to keep a tiny turtle I found at our lake cabin. I named him Ralph Chaney Lewis. He died on my birthday. My older brother felt so sad about it, he bought me a turtle that same day but its shell had been painted blue (they did that back then) and I think they breathe through their shells. He died the same week. I gave up on turtles.
6. Recently my friend Rita turned me onto the online game "Snood" when I spent a weekend at her house. I thought it was a sort of way-too-easy game but then I couldn't stop playing it. I have wasted entire days playing this game and if I'm on long phone calls, I play it in order to concentrate on the conversation. These are the confessions of a hopeless multi-tasker.
OK. Onto the Random Six Challenge
1. If I run out of cigarettes, I've been known to dig through ash trays at home for long butts. I know... this is sad and wrong.
2. I eat weird combinations of food, especially for breakfast, like... recently I had some leftover ring sausage & kraut, an egg (over easy) all covered with rooster sauce with a brownie and grapefruit juice, and not necessarily in that order. Oh, I think there was an Emergen-C and a few bites of hummos on a carrot in there somewhere.
3. When I was a kid, I used to give myself injections. Um-hmm. I had acquired syringes and needles from the doctor's office where my aunt worked, which she simply gave me, along with scalpels, tongue depressors, a stethoscope and myriad other implements, since I wanted to be a surgeon when I grew up. In my basement laboratory, I filled a boiled syringe with distilled water, held it upright and plunged until some water squirted out the needle after tapping to loosen bubbles and would then jam it into my leg. Why, you ask?
Multiple choice answers:
a) my friends wouldn't let me do it to them
b) i was sick of pretending on my surgically mangled and dismembered dolls
c) i liked how it felt
d) it was the 60's version of "cutting"
e) all of the above
4. At a certain young age, I chose to not cry. I willed myself against it. I didn't want "them" to win, whomever "they" were but "they" were always watching. As an adult, I cry a lot in the car listening to music... and sometimes, singing a cappella. Somewhere "they" are now winning.
5. I had always wanted a dog as a kid and my parents were unrelenting in their resistance. It was the only item I would put on my Christmas list every year, like this:
1) puppy
2) puppy
3) puppy ... and so on to the end of the page.
So, instead, I had a string. I dragged this string around everywhere. It had all kinds of animals on the end of it starting with puppies and ending with lions. I tied it to my bed at night. Its name, no matter which animal was attached, was Ralph. Eventually, I was allowed to keep a tiny turtle I found at our lake cabin. I named him Ralph Chaney Lewis. He died on my birthday. My older brother felt so sad about it, he bought me a turtle that same day but its shell had been painted blue (they did that back then) and I think they breathe through their shells. He died the same week. I gave up on turtles.
6. Recently my friend Rita turned me onto the online game "Snood" when I spent a weekend at her house. I thought it was a sort of way-too-easy game but then I couldn't stop playing it. I have wasted entire days playing this game and if I'm on long phone calls, I play it in order to concentrate on the conversation. These are the confessions of a hopeless multi-tasker.
posted by wendy lewis at 4/27/2008 11:42:00 AM
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